Joining the ranks of Spotify in the category of "lets brag about our activity" comes the Washington Post Social Reader, a revolutionary online newsreader that allows you to read the latest Post articles without ever having to leave Facebook. Immediately upon the release of this application, I, along with many others have been caught by this application and found ourselves, *gasp*, reading articles!
Wait, the hell is this?! Teenagers reading posts published by the Washington Post? The fuck is this? Kids my age are suppose to be mean to the newspaper and belittle it to nerdcore material, and obtain news from the gossip on TV, magazines and the Facebook news feed.
Oh, there we go! The Facebook news feed! Facebook! What a revelation! Teens only care about material that can be accessed via Facebook, and since the Post has designed this incredible (seriously, this who program is revolutionary) application to easily read its online content without ever having to leave Facebook, itself, how hard is it glance the headlines that the Post will think you like? Tell you what, it isn't. Plus thanks to the new sidebar in the upper-right hand corner of your Facebook page, you will never miss an update about your friend finding zebra cakes in his dorm room, or about some loser that reflects on his anti-Nickelback mindset during sophomore and junior years of high school.
Did I just cut myself down? How embarrassing. Where was I? Oh yes, the miracle of getting teens to read and give a flying fuck about the Washington Post. Back to the rant.
It is, though, about time that the Post understood the busy, lifestyles that us Generation X's and Y's have to deal with. Usually, the day of us teens begins with mustering together an already half-assed homework assignment, sleeping in class, slyly jacking off to some free online porn (oh wait, just kidding, no teens looks at porn. If you ask teens if they do, 100% of them will immediately and aggressively say they don't!), running around or pumping iron at gym, before spending a modest six or eight hours on Facebook.
Like I said, kids my age are far too busy with that type of activity to get out of our seats and drown our eyes into some paper. Oh, and our class "A" excuse? Going green. Really, it's to make us feel better when we forget to turn out the lights, or shamelessly throw that gum wrapper or cigarette butt on the sidewalk, in the hope no eco-freak cries foul at our laziness to properly dispose waste.
Wow, I have gone off a tangent. ADD moment. Where was I? Oh right, the Social Reader.
Naturally though, I have taken a look at some of the articles my peers have looked at. The connection? Fellow contemporaries (teenagers) like myself only delve into stories with catchy, misleading titles that end up being snarky blog posts that clearly style themselves after Tyler Talk. I'm kidding, that was sarcasm. Let's not get carried away. Tyler Talk is pristine, but it isn't the golden beacon of blogging. To bloggers like myself, that's a paradox of Internet subculture.
I could go on a rant and age myself with the spew that kids are not getting true news, but the way overly political adults love to call every newspaper post sheer bigotry, that would mean kids would have to read Assoiated Press briefs to get the "real news". And, would Social Reader risk that so that we can avoid a loud minority?
Didn't think so.
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